I must have at some point. It's impossible for a girl to grow up in church and not have heard it. But, while I had a Thirty-One Bags lunchbox (my friend Brianna will hook you up), I have no idea what the passage said until a couple of months ago.
I had been feeling discouraged about my role as a wife. Things just didn't feel right. I wanted to be a good wife, grounded in God and biblical principles, but all I could remember was the call to respect your husband. Husbands love your wives; wives respect your husbands.
But there had to be more to it than that. What did Proverbs 31 say? Wasn't that about wives?
Reluctantly, I got out my Bible. I already knew what it was going to say: something that boiled down to "submit to your husbands, be gentle, and stay in the kitchen." I mentally prepared to do a lot of Googling to find less offensive and culturally relevant interpretations of the passage.
But then I read it.
I don't think I've ever been that shocked by a Bible passage in my life.
Proverbs 31:10–31
10 A wife of noble character who can find?
She is worth far more than rubies.
11 Her husband has full confidence in her
and lacks nothing of value.
12 She brings him good, not harm,
all the days of her life.
13 She selects wool and flax
and works with eager hands.
14 She is like the merchant ships,
bringing her food from afar.
15 She gets up while it is still night;
she provides food for her family
and portions for her female servants.
16 She considers a field and buys it;
out of her earnings she plants a vineyard.
17 She sets about her work vigorously;
her arms are strong for her tasks.
18 She sees that her trading is profitable,
and her lamp does not go out at night.
19 In her hand she holds the distaff
and grasps the spindle with her fingers.
20 She opens her arms to the poor
and extends her hands to the needy.
21 When it snows, she has no fear for her household;
for all of them are clothed in scarlet.
22 She makes coverings for her bed;
she is clothed in fine linen and purple.
23 Her husband is respected at the city gate,
where he takes his seat among the elders of the land.
24 She makes linen garments and sells them,
and supplies the merchants with sashes.
25 She is clothed with strength and dignity;
she can laugh at the days to come.
26 She speaks with wisdom,
and faithful instruction is on her tongue.
27 She watches over the affairs of her household
and does not eat the bread of idleness.
28 Her children arise and call her blessed;
her husband also, and he praises her:
29 “Many women do noble things,
but you surpass them all.”
30 Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;
but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.
31 Honor her for all that her hands have done,
and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.
Y'all, that is not just a submissive and gentle woman who cooks for her family. That is a powerhouse pillar of society. This woman is intelligent, resourceful, shrewd, and strong. She plans well, she makes profitable business investments, she organizes a household, she pays the employees. Her job is not "doing what men can't be bothered with." Her job is "doing what it takes to make the world go round because she's really good at it." She guards and stewards her family in a way that is different, but no less challenging or vital, than her husband.
She is worth far more than rubies. She is like a merchant ship. She is to be honored and praised at the city gate.
This isn't a mold for wives to shove themselves into with a lot of help from the Holy Spirit; this is a wise and able Wonder Woman to which to aspire.
No pride-stroking Googling necessary. I put the Word away feeling humbled, and sheepish at the role I'd assumed God wanted to force on me. I put the Word away feeling empowered, inspired, and excited about my role as a wife.
This is a real job, with power and influence and consequence.
How could I for a second have underestimated my Creator's design?
~Stephanie
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