The Year Where Nothing Happened

Twenty twenty-three was a weird year to define. It was a year where people would ask, "So what's new with you guys?" and we wouldn't have anything to say. Nothing was new. Except...

Things were fundamentally changing, and I mean that literally-metaphorically :) Things were changing at the foundation, at the core, deep—where no one could see it.

We had zero visible life changes in 2023. We didn't move. We didn't change churches. We didn't get new jobs. No family members were born. I didn't finish the Fire Faery Story Book 1. We didn't even do a Random Roadtrip. We didn't do anything in 2023.

Normally a realization like this would fill me with frustration and discouragement. What a waste of 365 days. Nothing happened.

But that's not how I feel at all.

Twenty twenty-three was a year of readying, and I know that. I feel that. We may not have done much, but we became; we changed.

I started therapy.
I started saying "I'm not lazy, that just isn't within my boundaries right now."
I read some non-fiction books for fun—and actually enjoyed it.
I re-established the habit of going to the gym.
I learned the importance of validating kids' emotions first, before following up with my version of reality.
I uncovered the toxicity of my level of "shoulding."
I began to couch my work communication in fewer "maybes" and "I thinks" and "justs."
I learned that there's a difference between "being rude" and just having lower energy.
I learned that there's more to tracking my cycle than predicting ovulation and periods.
I discovered that I can write something other than the Fire Faery Trilogy.
I started trying to believe that other people are doing their best.
I started giving Gabe the benefit of the doubt instead of reacting in conversation.
I started coming to Gabe to say, "Can you talk about this feeling with me?"
I became more comfortable trying to learn things that I should've known already.
Gabe and I both began working to be less codependent.

And that's mostly just me. Gabe would have his own list, just as long.

There wasn't a lot to take pictures of in 2023, but damn, a lot changed.

In the language of "ready, aim, fire,"* last year was a year of readying. We were actively preparing to be the people we will be in 2024.

I don't know what will happen in 2024, but I know we'll be better prepared for it, and I am fully satisfied with that.

~Stephanie

* Hence the photo :)