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Friday, May 29, 2026

First Year of Parenting: I'm Glad We...


Maybe this post will be interesting, maybe it will come off like bragging. (That's actually one of the weirdly isolating things I've noticed about parenthood: if you talk about what's going well, it feels prideful or naive. If you talk about what's going poorly, it sounds like complaining or ingratitude.) When we were expecting Baby Elle, I loved reading about or watching other parents' lifestyles and techniques, sometimes because I wanted to emulate them, sometimes because I wanted to hate them. You're welcome to do either as well XD

I'm Glad We...
Prioritized pregnancy and postpartum core work
- I took core and pelvic floor work SO seriously during these seasons, and it paid me back a hundred fold. I had no diastasis recti (ab separation) while pregnant, and I do not pee myself when I jump today. Those first few weeks post-pushing, I was shocked at how much I relied on my abs. I needed them to lean forward to reach my water, to brace my core when changing positions with Elle, to support my organs as they healed. If you're pregnant, I cannot recommend core and pelvic floor work enough. (This realization also had me in AWE of c-section mamas, who have to go through postpartum AND surgery recovery AND can't use their abs for weeks?! Y'all are another level of superwomen, for real.)

Chose baby-led weaning - I was weirdly excited to try this approach to food, and we've LOVED it! Elle is so good at using utensils, makes very little mess AT THIS POINT (unless she loves the food too much to contain herself), and likes trying new foods. I hear the toddler years are going to have us doing a 180 on most of that, but so far we've had a lot of fun and I'm glad we used this approach 😂 I will say if you're going to go this route, you gotta make peace with the mess ahead of time. There's going to be a lot of wiping and spraying and changing clothes and finding shreds of cheese and dried yogurt and grains of rice around your house for...maybe ever.

Let Elle go barefoot - Elle has, uh, almost never worn shoes. She has tried shoes ON, and she's walked around the house in them for fun, and she wore them once to a park because its surface was asphalty, but that's it. Barefoot is supposed to be really good for brain development and body awareness, and y'all know we love us some of that. All winter long it was socks only; around the house and in the yard and on the sidewalk and at the library and at the coffee shop it's been barefoot. Maybe that's gross, but as my friend Meghan said, "That's what wipes are for" 😂 

Avoided screen time - I don't think there's any way to write this bullet point without sounding judgy, but Elle has never watched a screen. We don't have the TV on when she's in the room, we try not to use our phones around her, and we sit her with her back to the TVs at restaurants. This was REALLY difficult at first. I didn't realize how much TV I'd gotten used to watching during the day until we had Elle, but thankfully it's gotten easier the longer we've done it. Who's to say what's personality and what's environment, but Elle is the queen of less-is-more entertainment. She finds delight in very simple things, like holding mulch, or moving tea bags from one chair to another, or seeing how things look different through the mesh on the back of our camp chair. She likes people watching and is extremely easy to keep engaged. Again, this could have nothing to do with screens/no screens, but we've only been happy about this decision.

If we're able to get pregnant again one day, it'll be interesting to see which of these things we do again, and which are first-time-parent privileges. For example, it would be a lot more difficult to fit in a daily core work regimen with a toddler, or keep a toddler quiet during a baby's nap time without screens. I hope one day we'll get to find out—but not for a couple of years at least, please Lawd 
🤣

~Stephanie

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